making the switch

When I first learned how to drive a car, my dad told me something that I still think about when I drive. That day I was visibly anxious about getting into the lane I needed to be in for the turn that I knew was coming up. I was overthinking--the turn wasn't for another couple miles. But my dad noticed me glancing in the mirror to see how much space was in the other lane, and he told me, "if you're thinking about getting over, do it." I put my blinker on, stopped thinking about it, and got over.

Now every time I begin to think about changing lanes, I put my blinker on. There's no use in waiting or I'll start worrying about if there will be space for me in the other lane.

I hold the same philosophy with a lot of things. Essentially, if you're thinking about doing something, do it. Don't wait. Tell people, if you want. Book tickets to Hawaii. Buy the dress at the thrift store. Tell someone how you feel about them.* In this case, switch your diet.

Last August I went vegan. I was walking to class, eating a salad, and thinking that I should really eat more salads. (I wish I had a line graph of the salads I've eaten over time. That data would interest me). When I got to class, we watched a nature documentary. Then I sent my roommates this text:

And then I went vegan. That wasn't the first time I thought about it. I'd been curious without considering for a while. But, why not? I was thinking about it. I did it.

I'm not new to dietary changes. In the past couple of years I've done keto, dairy free, whole30, gluten free, sugar-free, and vegan. I like giving myself rules about food. It's the only time I actually like rules, and I've found something I liked in every dietary .

So, being vegan. Easier than I thought. Ate a lot of bread, peanut butter, and more processed foods than I thought I would. And for some reason, my normal low-on-the-sugar rationale went out the window. This is because not many baked goods and sweet things are vegan, so I allowed myself to make my own. I made lots of vegan cakes during this time, because it was a challenge I wanted to master.

People would assume that I had strong convictions for being vegan. Some thought it would offend me if they ate meat in front of me. While I do believe that we are, as a society, not being very nice to our cows and chickens, I'm not about to flood the streets with a sign that says "milk is murder." I think there's a lot of health to be found in sustainable meats and animal products.

So why did I do it?

Because I wanted to.

Other reasons include wanting to eat more salad, wanting to try something new, wanting to explore new foods, wanting to make rules for myself just because, and wanting to see what it was really like to be vegan. And it was so much fun! While sometimes I guilted myself for not staying true with every single choice, it was so fun to find vegan places and menu items. In some situations, it was liberating. When I was super full, I didn't get to have the dessert that my body didn't really want.

I think it's really important to experiment with alternatives. By trying tofu and almondmilk yogurt and different kinds of beans and eating lots of olives, I discovered some new favorite brands, stores, and baking tips (I already knew I liked olives, I just ate more). As someone that has and will continue to work in an environment with food, this knowledge and experience will enable me to connect with people that are starting the journey and show that I care in a special way. For example, if you've never tried to cut dairy out of your diet, you wont know how to recommend a dairy free cheese or yogurt to someone. If someone orders a no cheese pizza or wants to try to make a sugar free frappucino, I'm not going to laugh and say that their diet is dumb. I'm going to show them I care--and this is something I can do outside of the workplace too. If a friend is gluten free, vegan, sugar free, or any combination of those, I'll know what to make them for dinner in any situation!

I would be remiss if I left off another really amazing thing I learned while being vegan: how supportive my friends and family were. My roommates refused to bake cookies that weren't vegan. Becca loved my cakes, even when they tasted a little more like bread than they should have. Clara went vegan for a whole month with me, just because I asked. My dad thought it was cool. My mom told me to do whatever made me happy. 12 girls in Wisconsin let me cook them dinner. No one tried to tell me it wasn't healthy for me, pressured me to eat meat, or grilled (ha) me for my choices. My guy friends laughed at me for it, but it was all in fun. I thought that people might judge me or think differently of me for it, but everyone I knew was respectful. I heard things like, "oh, my niece is gluten free!" or "hey, I'm vegetarian!" People wanted to share their dietary finds with me, and were excited for my choices. Without this kind of support, my time as a vegan would have been a lot harder and way less fun. But instead, Naomi made me vegan cinnamon rolls, my mom bought me B12 vitamins, and Clara walked alongside me for all of Veganuary.

But now, just shy of a year into my journey, I'm changing my diet again. I've decided to make the switch to vegetarian. This is for a couple of reasons.

First, I've noticed that I'm not the most faithful vegan there ever was. While I don't ever crave meat or cheese anymore, and I will always choose an alternative milk over dairy milk, it was hard for me to avoid chocolate, as well as items that were made with butter or baked with eggs.

Second, I've transitioned to a period in the summer where I am working three jobs at once and work a double every few days. This increases my need for nutrient (and protein) dense foods. I also work at Starbucks and get a free food item every time I work. Believe it or not, they're not all frappuccino's and cake pops. I'm excited to try their spinach and feta wrap, and they have a sandwich with a plant based patty!

Lastly, I think that being vegan wasn't serving my body anymore. Without my roommate Clara to make healthy food with me, and as I am now trying to keep my fridge as cost effective as possible, I noticed that I've slipped into eating more processed foods and ignoring the good stuff. I also noticed that my body has changed very little since I started being vegan, and, as I'm always looking to increase my health, am excited to add more proteins in.

I do have to admit that almost no food has ever specifically affected my body, so it's possible that I will continue to be my exact shape and composition with this new change. I've not made myself allergic to cheese anymore than I've lost muscle for not eating meat. (The only effect I noticed was a few days of constipation at the beginning of the transition, tmi, sorry). But I think the next thing I want to pursue with my vegetarianism is an decreased intake of processed foods and an inclination towards seasonal foods. I also want to devote more time to studying new, niche, and natural foods, to learn more about how they interact with the body. I hope my new serving job at Parker's Bistro, a restaurant that values organic, local, and seasonal food, will help me with this.

It's all about becoming a more knowledgeable, intuitive, and healthy eater for me. Veganism wasn't suiting my schedule anymore. While I do feel some annoyance at having not made it a full year, it's useless to hold on to something just for name value when it doesn't mean what it used to to you. Nothing lasts forever.

So today for the first time in about a year, I put an egg (!) into the chocolate coffee cupcakes I'm making for my brother's birthday, and I bought greek yogurt from the store. I'm excited for all the new things I'll learn along this journey and how it will complement my current schedule and jobs. I'm becoming a barista, a fine dining waitress, a local artist, and a vegetarian.

And what's next? Will I be a vegetarian forever? Most definitely not. I want to try pescatarian, food combining, mediterranean, paleo, you name it.

p.s. here's a video from the cupcake making process where I brewed coffee in a tea sachet. I was planning to make a short video of the process with high quality audio and pretty shots, but decided not to.

*I don't know who needs to hear this, but if you have a crush on someone, telling them and seeing their reaction will free you from the brain jail that your thoughts and desires may have built around you**.

**You could also apply Shrek's words: "better out than in I always say, eh Fiona?"***

***Adamson, Andrew, et al. Shrek 2. Universal City, CA: DreamWorks Home Entertainment, 2004.